Are Your Dating “Standards” Holding You Back?

By Amanda Paul on November 24, 2015

image via fencingwithink.com

We all have preferences when it comes to dating. Maybe you go for the funny type, or you’re charmed by intellect, or perhaps it’s a sexy body that seals the deal for you. Whatever it may be, everyone has certain things that they are more attracted to than others; it’s a completely normal part of attraction! But when these preferences become concrete standards, you may be getting yourself into some trouble!

Think about it this way: if you only date people who meet the specific set of traits that you are interested in, then you are limiting yourself to only one type of person. By dating only one type of person, how do you really know what else is out there and what else you like? So at what point do standards become limiting? Let’s discuss:

You standards may be limiting your love life if…

  • Your list of standards for your mate is so long that no real-life human comes to mind when considering your dream boyfriend/girlfriend
  • You have a physical list of standards, like you wrote them out for reference! (I’m not making this one up, it happens!)
  • You are fixated on physical appearance, down to the nitty gritty details like how defined someone’s abs are or if they are tan enough for your taste
  • You aren’t even willing to go on a first date with someone who doesn’t meet all of your standards
  • Your list of deal breakers is just as extensive as your list of standards
  • You standards aren’t rooted in characteristics that you enjoy from those around you, like wanting goofy partner because you enjoy your goofy friends

 

So having certain preferences and standards are normal, but being open minded could reveal things to you that you never knew you wanted. So don’t let your standards or expectations pigeonhole you! Besides, there is no harm in going a first date and just seeing who else is out there!

 

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